When The Universe Conspires ….

„So, I love you, because the entire universe conspires to help me find you.”

The Alchemist – Paolo Coelho.

All I know is that line from Paolo is true. I said so, because it happened to me. Even though I am still struggling with my own feeling, do I really love you or the universe conspires to help you finding me.

Now, I am not 100% sure and fully understand of what might happen after what happened just a few days before New Year.

Do you still remember, I have asked you once last year? Do you still remember how we met each other after getting lost contact in early 2008? Well, I did not remember anymore, because for me, I am already being thankful just seeing your face, have funny chats about what happened since we lost contact and now … we don´t talk to each other anymore.

I don´t want to lose contact again with you, but it seems that I have hung my wishes too high in the sky.

So, it looks like that we are going to lose contact to each other once again. And if the entire universe conspires to help us finding each other again, then I do really hope, pray and wish that we don´t have to find each other ever again.

How I miss your laugh, your smile and your naughty face so much, H.

Liebe Grüße,


First Monday of The Year

6. January 2014

Today is the first Monday of the year. One thing I know for sure right now is that I am jobless. Hahaha. Hopefully, it will change soon.

Really, I need a booster right now. Someone or something, somehow.

Well, let´s start the day with something good, such as a mug of hot chocolate for breakfast? It would be great for something to be thanked, right? Or, you want to have a cup of tea or coffee? Or even a cup of dairy milk? Plus a piece of Pretzel to full your stomach? Go ahead.

Yes, I feel so thankful that I still can zip hot chocolate this morning. Last night I can sleep well on my bed and dreaming something, which I don´t really remember what it was. How did I know that I slept well last night? Because, I dreamt something.

Maybe, we have heard so many times people said, be thankful of what you already have in your hand. It is true. I see it back in my past. What I got. What I have reached. What I loose. What I try to keep. And, what I have to try to let go. Letting go is never easy to do willingly.

And, it is enough with that all.

Now, I want to start to write again. Not for something big to talk about but something small and simple but meaningful in my daily life.

Let´s start with:

1.       How thankful I am that my neighbor lend me his mountain bike to ride somewhere in Sanur area.

2.       How happy I was in the New Year´s evening I have a visit. Suddenly, my brother came along from Medan to Sanur. 3 years I haven´t seen him and his changed a lot. Especially in his face.

3.       How glad I was that I spent New Year´s evening, since I didn´t have any plan in that night. Well, actually I planned just to sleep and spend the night just for me and myself, which didn´t successful.

4.       How happy I was standing under midnight rain. The rain poured down from the night sky just like a bucket of water that somehow fall on to your head and make you wet inside out. It was funny and tired night to have. First time in my life.

5.       How happy I was that I wasn´t alone spending that night. Last year´s end I spent it alone in minus degree night in Denmark. How miserable life I have had that night, but also very happy because of the vacation to the North Pole on Christmas and hug Santa Claus in his village in Rovaniemi. Lol. Life. Life. Life. Oh, life.

6.       How thankful I was to know the truth but also quite sad to know that a friend I trusted was my true enemy all these months. Now, I cut her out from my fiend list and that´s it.

7.       How thankful I am to have this new friend from München. Hopefully, we can meet again soon.

8.       How thankful I am that I still have my mom calling me anytime she wants. Lol again. Even though it´s quite annoying sometimes.

9.       How thankful I am that I still can see the sunset sky from my front door on this second floor. It´s true. The sunset view in Bali has magic and stunning view.

10.   And, hope not the last thing to be thankful for this year is, I still can write.


Talking about New Year is only hope and resolves that I can think of. I have many wishes and hopes for this year. But, I don´t know which one may come true or not. Let´s see what might happen.